I have sat down to try to write this many times in the past 24hours and each time nothing has really come out but I am sitting down now to try again.
Yesterday I said good-bye to the life I had enjoyed, loved and cherished for these last fifteen months. I will never be sorry for the times I have had with Sean and his family, the experiences and places I have gone. Netball, Slurpees and Cricket are three of the first things that come to mind about the new things Sean and his life showed me.
However, not all good things never end and I realised that whilst I will always love Sean, the love I felt for him now was very different from the love I had felt for the last fifteen months, I no longer saw him as the one I wanted to grow old beside. He was no longer the one for me.
I asked myself so many times, why had my feelings changed so quickly and for that I can offer no rhyme or reason so I did what I knew I had to do. I broke it off with a wonderful guy. I felt terrible doing it, for hurting him and for not been able to offer him a substantial reason other than that it no longer felt right for me.
And now it is just me, no more Sunday cricket adventures. Just me, trying to figure out what I need to do in my life and how to fill my time.